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Biographies : Interview with Rebekka

Interviewed by: Deb Dupas

For: Natural Horsemanship Association of Northern Nevada

Co-secretary Rebekka Rhodes has helped many of our members grow and learn with their horses. She recently was able to "retire" from her position at Reno Orthopedic and move on to a more-than-full-time career as a horse trainer and riding instructor. She is a mom and a grandma with an 18 year old son who attends (by choice) a private boarding academy in California, and a 22 year old daughter who has two kids of her own. Rebekka met Mark after moving to Reno with her two young children. They embarked on their life together which has led them both to careers involving horses -- www.centaurgenics.com is their website and it provides information on both of their services– check it out! Rebekka and Mark currently own five horses and one pony that is out on lease pending purchase. She says of her horses, "Our 5 horses have been bred and raised completely by us. We have a 10 year old Appaloosa gelding named Lucky, an 8 year old Appaloosa mare named L.C., a 6 year old Quarter Horse stallion named Beau, a 2 year old Appy/QH filly named Bailey, and a yearling Appy/QH filly named Lacey. Each of these horses has his or her own special story, as horses always do. But each one is special because we have bred them ourselves, for our own use." The following is a Q & A session I had with Rebekka via email. -Deb D.)

What were your beginnings in the horse world and where has it led you?

R.) I've loved horses as long as I can remember. My parents took us to the Grand National Horse and Stock Show in San Francisco every single year, and I believe I lived for that! I prayed for a pony of my own every night too, and never stopped until I got one. But that didn't happen until I was 10. When I was 9 I went to summer camp and took Horsemanship. The following year when I was 10 I went back and helped "teach" the same horsemanship class. Even as a youngster I "trained" my own ponies and "taught" all my friends. I got my first horse colt when I was 13 and started him myself. I also went to work for a working cow horse trainer, and when he rode the colt I'd started myself, he really liked what I'd done so he let me start riding his horses. It just continued from there, with more horses, more experiences, more learning. The whole story is too long! There is one thing that has not changed in my entire life, though. I've always been hungry for more. Hungry to learn, hungry to experience, hungry to have what I actually finally have now. By that I mean a life that pretty much revolves around horses, and always learning and getting better at it. I'm loving it!

I know you rode competitively and did quite well, but no longer compete. What do you miss the most and least about riding at that level?

R.) I do still compete if an owner of a horse I'm training wants their horse to be shown, so I'm not completely out of the "competition". But I am not showing any of my own horses currently, and mostly because I no longer have the desire to do that. A lot of what that was about was the competitive side of me, because I knew that we could do it and wanted to prove that. But a lot of it was for the exposure for my horses, to get them better trained, and the exposure for me. I have always had a severe case of "stage fright", and that was one way for me to work through the issue and develop ways to deal with that fear. I miss the "thrill of competition"! I also miss the focus that comes from having specific time-related goals. But I've filled those gaps for the most part by having other sorts of goals with time constraints, yet it is so much better now because I don't feel the need so much to push a horse to a specific point whether it is good for the horse or not. That part isn't good. Too many people sacrifice quality training and a horse's mental/physical/emotional well-being in order to accomplish their own specific set of goals. When I'm not showing, I feel I work according to the horse's needs and time frames much better. The pressure isn't there, so I listen to the horses better. That is also part of the reason I don't feel like showing/competing too much any more. I have a hard time accepting how some other people can treat their horses under the pressure of competition. Not everyone is affected that way, or treat their horses inconsiderately, but some people do, and you can see that at the shows and competitions quite regularly. I don't like to watch horses be handled badly.

When did you discover "Natural" horsemanship? Was there a certain circumstance? Influential person?

R.) In 1992 I attended a two-day clinic with Pat Parelli, mostly because I'd gotten a mare that seemed really troubled. I loved her so much I wanted to make her feel better, and I had no interest in forcing her, because I knew that she'd had enough of that already. I had been looking into these philosophies before, but that was a critical turning point in my approach to horses and their training. Having been raised with the "bigger bit, bigger spurs" theory of training horses, I felt as if I'd finally found what I'd really been looking for all along. My horses agreed!

What is your favorite horse-related activity -- or maybe you have several?

R.) That's a tough question, because I like so many things! I love riding in general, but I really love riding in new places or places that I can explore. I'm sort of the adventurous type! So hunting (where we camp in remote areas) with horses is near the top of the list. I love living with them so close, and living on them all day. I also really love teaching my horse new "tricks" -- if I had all the time in the world, we'd be learning as much together as possible, and he'd be in heaven too because he loves to "play" new games! In another aspect of what I love, it is euphoria when I make a connection with a wild horse that has never before been touched, or we make some other monstrous breakthrough (with domestic or wild horses). That is so cool!

What is your favorite part of being a riding instructor/trainer?

R.) Obviously being around horses all day every day, but also what I just mentioned before. Whenever students, be they horses or humans, have a need, I love to be able to guide them to a better place. Watching the breakthroughs, feeling the relief, the success, and the positive result is extremely rewarding! I also really love working with people and horses when they are receptive to learning and really willing to work hard and stick with things.

Least favorite?

R.) It is very difficult when someone (horse or human) is in a tough place, but they are struggling to "get it" or are fighting the reality of the situation. I always want things to be perfect, but that's not real life, so this aspect of teaching and training has been a learning experience for me. I've had to learn that not everyone is going to "get it", least of all in the same way. I do enjoy searching for answers though! I think it is even more difficult when someone expects me to just "fix it" for them. Sometimes it's as if a student thinks that if I apply a new coat of paint to the problem, the problem is simply gone. It's as if they expect a simple fix, like taking their car to a mechanic and then having it be all better when they go to pick up the car. Horses and riding aren't like that. The most successful students are those who take what I've offered and apply it regularly. It's hard to learn to play the piano if you don't practice your piano lessons!

What are your goals for yourself in working on your Natural Horsemanship skills?

R.) While I'd dearly love to have the time to progress further through the Parelli levels program (simply and mostly because it is goal oriented, and so am I, so it "keeps me on task") that is not the most important thing to me. I just keep open to adding more tools to my toolbox. I have a lot of tools right now, but I'll never have them all! The horses tell me how good I'm getting, too. So while the Parelli levels program gives feedback on progress made in specific tasks, the horses are the real teachers who tell you if you got it right! They are the ones who matter, not the program results. So if and when I ever have a "fight" with a horse, I have to stop and ask myself (and the horse) where I went wrong, or what important element I missed that could have prevented a fight. I'm not talking about getting a bucking horse to stop bucking. I'm talking about a horse that might have what someone calls an attitude. I'm talking about not fighting with that horse so much to achieve your goals, but rather looking for ways to gain the horse's cooperation. To me, that is what Natural Horsemanship should always be about. Unfortunately, a lot of people use the techniques to achieve superiority or total dominance. I'm looking for cooperative leadership, where the horses love my leadership ability, therefore seek me out to help them and protect them. I personally adore a horse who thinks for himself and has spirit. As long as we have a mutually respectful relationship, and I am a trusted and respected leader of that relationship, I allow the horse his opinion. Sometimes, I ask for his input. After all, there are lots of situations where the horse is better suited than I to make a decision! My senses aren't quite as acute as a horse's, so it has paid off to pay attention to that. But then I ask for his opinion, and he's willing to wait for me to ask because he respects and trusts me.

What have you learned from horses that you have applied to your life? Or what have horses taught you about life?

R.) I think that patience is probably number one. It's probably the "hardest" thing, too, now that I think about it! I'm not a very patient person and I have a temper, too. I'd say that has been the single most important lesson I've had to learn. The great part is that I've been able to develop my patience quotient quite significantly! And it's a good thing!!! I'm sure my family have reaped the benefits of that, and so have people whom I've worked with. Of course, those are things that can always be improved upon. The horses are continuous teachers, and I continuously strive to get even better. The second thing is probably learning to recognize and accept the "try". It has really helped me to be more "allowing" in my life, less demanding, less perfectionistic. That's not to say I don't still strive for that perfection, but it does make me able to tolerate the little baby steps along the way without so much impatience! The horses have no need for perfection, so I have to be more like that. It's up to me to adjust to fit them in their situations, and to accept what they have offered to me as they learn.

Why do you recommend Natural Horsemanship or what would you say to someone who had never heard of Natural Horsemanship about it?

R.) I have been on the other side of the spectrum, and this side feels so much better! The horses all agree with me, too. To have a horse be a willing partner, versus an adversary, is such a cool feeling. The performance is so much better and more consistent. There is so much more brilliance when a horse wants to perform for me, rather than is forced to perform. It's easier in the long run, and actually takes less time. It also requires less repetition, and it fosters a healthier horse mentally, physically and emotionally. Horses last longer and do more. Plus my anxiety level is greatly reduced when, for example, I know that the horse will load easily without a fight, instead of having to allow for that "fight time", or that he will readily respond to my aids/thoughts. If someone doesn't believe that this could be a good thing for them, I'd compare my horse to theirs any day and see which one they'd prefer. Just going out to catch them would prove the difference! Mine doesn't have to be caught -- he wants to see me and "play" with me, so he just comes right over, even I have a halter or a bridle and saddle. I don't have to catch and hold him to worm him or trim his feet, or anything.

Aside from all this, what kinds of things do you like to do?

R.) I have a lot of other interests! I like to hunt, fish, camp, hike, ride bikes and motorcycles, snow ski, snorkeling, travel, play the piano and sing, music in general, write, read, draw, star gazing, bird watching and occasionally go dancing! There is probably more -- I'm generally open for anything that is healthy.

What is one thing you wish for? (You can interpret that in terms of horses or not!)

R.) Obviously, at this time in our nation's history, peace ranks up at the top of the list, along with freedom from fear and terrorism. Solidarity makes up part of that, but in order to have solidarity we have to have acceptance of one another. So I guess in terms of our humanity as well as in our horse world and horse lives, acceptance of our differences is critical. A "live and let live" attitude could go a long ways! So many people in the horse world live with prejudices -- strong prejudices. Breed prejudices, style prejudices, group prejudices... That's why I am loving the Natural Horsemanship Association of Northern Nevada right now. We are successfully crossing barriers in the horse world when we have all breeds, all disciplines, show people and non-show people, all coming together and sharing things with each other for the betterment of the horses in our lives and our relationships with them. We have endurance riders, barrel racers, dressage enthusiasts, gaited horse folks, you name it! And the true beauty of it is that no one is judging another based upon any prejudice. We're all in this together to get closer to our horses and have better relationships with them. It can't help but have a positive impact on the rest of our lives and our other relationships. That's what I love about what I do -- like a single drop of food coloring in a glass of water, the good stuff that we learn with our horses can't help but permeate the rest of our lives to some degree or another. That's the best!